"Love everyone, but only fuck the hot chicks."
For months, The Chemical Buddha tried to love everyone (and everything). Or at least everyone and everything that would let him 'love' it. And while it led to several awkward mornings of hung over haze looking at the latest whale he’d just harpooned, it also helped The Chemical Buddha decide he'd rather just fuck the hot chicks. So while he could still feel love towards all things, he didn’t need to express it physically with everyone. Especially those who were f'ugly. Unless he was really drunk or really horny or really high or just didn't want to sleep by himself or if every attractive woman he had hit on shot him down, then he would give up his pursuit of hot chicks and settle for whoever he could nail.
How often do you settle in your life?
What line do you need to draw between what you want and what you're willing to put up with?
How will making choices to go after what you want help you in your life?
Friday, August 14, 2009
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Buy in Bulk and Save
"I’m the pharmacist of enlightenment."
The Chemical Buddha wasn't much of a business expert, but he did know the advantages of paying wholesale over retail. Which is why, after years of supporting his local dealer, TCB decided he too could support his habit by becoming a dealer on his own. (In retrospect, this turned out to be a horrible idea because he just used up all of the stuff he had intended to sell. The only way The Chemical Buddha wouldn't do drugs was if there were no drugs in the house.) But before he learned that lesson, TCB rationalized that he would no longer be dependent upon someone else for his mind-altering experiences. In fact, he would be able to better help others open their minds. And the rest is spiritual history.
When will your realize that the student is now the teacher?
When will you start showing others the way instead of depending upon someone else's guidance?
The Chemical Buddha wasn't much of a business expert, but he did know the advantages of paying wholesale over retail. Which is why, after years of supporting his local dealer, TCB decided he too could support his habit by becoming a dealer on his own. (In retrospect, this turned out to be a horrible idea because he just used up all of the stuff he had intended to sell. The only way The Chemical Buddha wouldn't do drugs was if there were no drugs in the house.) But before he learned that lesson, TCB rationalized that he would no longer be dependent upon someone else for his mind-altering experiences. In fact, he would be able to better help others open their minds. And the rest is spiritual history.
When will your realize that the student is now the teacher?
When will you start showing others the way instead of depending upon someone else's guidance?
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Be Safe
"Safety is an illusion."
The Chemical Buddha found some people really, really wanted to feel safe. So much so they would try and control everything around them to have it. No matter how unattainable it was, these people would do practically anything to have it. Luckily, TCB's belief that safety was attainable fell away after one late night house party when, just before dawn, The Chemical Buddha discovered that some of his guests had had sex in his bed. (And didn't invite him.) Plus they smoked half a joint he had on his nightstand. Not only was his concept of safety totally smashed but he had to sleep on the wet spot too.
In general, do you feel safe? Why or why not?
Do you think it's possible to obtain safety?
What other areas of life do you think are unchanging? (Or do you want to be unchanging?)
In your experience, have you found that things change to matter what you do or that you can keep things from changing?
The Chemical Buddha found some people really, really wanted to feel safe. So much so they would try and control everything around them to have it. No matter how unattainable it was, these people would do practically anything to have it. Luckily, TCB's belief that safety was attainable fell away after one late night house party when, just before dawn, The Chemical Buddha discovered that some of his guests had had sex in his bed. (And didn't invite him.) Plus they smoked half a joint he had on his nightstand. Not only was his concept of safety totally smashed but he had to sleep on the wet spot too.
In general, do you feel safe? Why or why not?
Do you think it's possible to obtain safety?
What other areas of life do you think are unchanging? (Or do you want to be unchanging?)
In your experience, have you found that things change to matter what you do or that you can keep things from changing?
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Hey Bartender
"What do I believe? I believe I’ll have another."
The Chemical Buddha believed that people's lives have more purpose and meaning when they believe in something. Be it in the good of humanity. The importance of pairing French fries with apple sauce. Or the pursuit of the perfect talk belcher. It's important to believe in something. Anything. So while The Chemical Buddha might not have had beliefs around fair play, what is morally right, what brings a person pleasure, how to be socially appropriate, how to treat other human beings (you get the idea). He did have a firm belief system (or life mission) around the ingestion of intoxicants, which could be easily summed up (no matter how out of it he was) in three simple words: "I’ll have another."
What do you believe in?
In what areas of your life are you unwilling to compromise?
What is your life's mission? Your purpose for being?
The Chemical Buddha believed that people's lives have more purpose and meaning when they believe in something. Be it in the good of humanity. The importance of pairing French fries with apple sauce. Or the pursuit of the perfect talk belcher. It's important to believe in something. Anything. So while The Chemical Buddha might not have had beliefs around fair play, what is morally right, what brings a person pleasure, how to be socially appropriate, how to treat other human beings (you get the idea). He did have a firm belief system (or life mission) around the ingestion of intoxicants, which could be easily summed up (no matter how out of it he was) in three simple words: "I’ll have another."
What do you believe in?
In what areas of your life are you unwilling to compromise?
What is your life's mission? Your purpose for being?
Monday, August 10, 2009
Have a Nice Day
"Women are friendly to be friendly. Men are friendly to get in your pants."
The Chemical Buddha learned this insight the hard way. Just because he would point out to a woman that he wanted to have sex with that she had a little bit of vomit on the corner of her mouth or if he said, "Excuse me," after ripping off a really loud fart to a woman as a form of sexual foreplay. Just because he did these things didn't mean everyone was that way. It took him a long time to figure out that just because a woman told him the time or pointed out that he had stepped in dog shit didn't mean she wanted to have sex with him. And even after he learned it, that didn't keep him from asking everyone woman that didn't react in disgust toward him if they wanted to fuck. He just chalked it up to one of the differences between men and women that he would never understand.
Are you only nice to people when you want something?
Do you think people are only nice because they want something?
Do you seek to understand someone or to make yourself understood?
Do you look at your own behavior towards others or concern yourself with how others treat you?
The Chemical Buddha learned this insight the hard way. Just because he would point out to a woman that he wanted to have sex with that she had a little bit of vomit on the corner of her mouth or if he said, "Excuse me," after ripping off a really loud fart to a woman as a form of sexual foreplay. Just because he did these things didn't mean everyone was that way. It took him a long time to figure out that just because a woman told him the time or pointed out that he had stepped in dog shit didn't mean she wanted to have sex with him. And even after he learned it, that didn't keep him from asking everyone woman that didn't react in disgust toward him if they wanted to fuck. He just chalked it up to one of the differences between men and women that he would never understand.
Are you only nice to people when you want something?
Do you think people are only nice because they want something?
Do you seek to understand someone or to make yourself understood?
Do you look at your own behavior towards others or concern yourself with how others treat you?
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Pleasure and Pain
"It is said even constant orgasming can become agony. That's a risk I'm willing to take."
The masters said too much of anything could become painful and that we needed pain to know pleasure. That light couldn't exist without dark. And while this theory seemed to make a lot of sense on the surface, The Chemical Buddha believed they only used it to explain a particularly difficult and painful stretch a student was experiencing. Because really? Has anyone had too much pleasure? Fuck no! And there didn't seem to be any risk of that happening either. So when his teachers cautioned TCB about wishing for never-ending joy (like in today's insight) The Chemical Buddha wasn't worried at all. In fact, he would reply, "Like that’s ever going to happen dumb ass." As far as we know, The Chemical Buddha never did experience constant orgasming, although that didn’t keep him from trying every pill and ointment he could buy to make it happen.
What reasons do you use to explain why things happen in your life?
What do you spend your time wishing for?
Do you actually think it'll come true, or do you just wish for the sake of wishing?
The masters said too much of anything could become painful and that we needed pain to know pleasure. That light couldn't exist without dark. And while this theory seemed to make a lot of sense on the surface, The Chemical Buddha believed they only used it to explain a particularly difficult and painful stretch a student was experiencing. Because really? Has anyone had too much pleasure? Fuck no! And there didn't seem to be any risk of that happening either. So when his teachers cautioned TCB about wishing for never-ending joy (like in today's insight) The Chemical Buddha wasn't worried at all. In fact, he would reply, "Like that’s ever going to happen dumb ass." As far as we know, The Chemical Buddha never did experience constant orgasming, although that didn’t keep him from trying every pill and ointment he could buy to make it happen.
What reasons do you use to explain why things happen in your life?
What do you spend your time wishing for?
Do you actually think it'll come true, or do you just wish for the sake of wishing?
Saturday, August 8, 2009
And the Answer is …?
"Just confirm what I already believe."
Throughout history, mankind has had questions about life and formed beliefs around the answer to those questions. Like everyone else, The Chemical Buddha had his own questions. And as he sought answers, he discovered he got angry when people disagreed with what he already thought or told him something he didn't want to hear/know. And the same could be said when he answered other people's questions. TCB found the truth had very little to do with perception and if you ever wanted to see that person again, one had to be able to read the situation very well before answering. So today's insight applies to those questions that have no 'right' answer. Questions like, "Do theses jeans make my butt look big?" "What are you thinking about?" and "Was it good for you?"
How do you react when talking to people you disagree with? Do you get angry or try to see things from their perspective?
What questions do you have that you really don't want to 'know' the answer to?
What questions do you just want people to agree with you?
Throughout history, mankind has had questions about life and formed beliefs around the answer to those questions. Like everyone else, The Chemical Buddha had his own questions. And as he sought answers, he discovered he got angry when people disagreed with what he already thought or told him something he didn't want to hear/know. And the same could be said when he answered other people's questions. TCB found the truth had very little to do with perception and if you ever wanted to see that person again, one had to be able to read the situation very well before answering. So today's insight applies to those questions that have no 'right' answer. Questions like, "Do theses jeans make my butt look big?" "What are you thinking about?" and "Was it good for you?"
How do you react when talking to people you disagree with? Do you get angry or try to see things from their perspective?
What questions do you have that you really don't want to 'know' the answer to?
What questions do you just want people to agree with you?
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