"Enlightenment is great and all that, but it doesn't help you get a good parking space."
Before attaining enlightenment, The Chemical Buddha had been told he would obtain many wondrous things upon becoming one with all that is: sex, drugs, money, servants, limos, mansions, and more were all promised. But nowhere on that list was mentioned a good parking space. Luckily, due to years of extreme overeating and rampant, unchecked drug use, The Chemical Buddha was able to obtain the one thing that would guarantee rock star parking as long as he walked the earth – a handicapped parking tag.
Are your preconceived notions making things too difficult?
Is there a simpler solution to the path you're on?
How might the path you're already on get you what you truly want?
About The Elvis of Enlightenment
- The Chemical Buddha
- Not much is known about The Chemical Buddha (as he preferred to be called) other than he was a crack baby with fetal alcohol syndrome born into a family of hippie hedonists. Throughout his life, The Chemical Buddha sought spiritual enlightenment through excess. To put it quite simply, he saw himself as the Elvis of Enlightenment. While still in his-mid twenties, The Chemical Buddha left this earthly plain for the last time while beer bonging chicken gravy and shooting heroin as he engaged in an orgy that included at least four members of the amphibian family. His last coherent words, before he asphyxiated on vomit that was not entirely his own, was “Nirvana. Choke! Gag! Cough!” Did The Chemical Buddha transcend his earthly bonds through his unorthodox lifestyle? Did he find the key to “Nirvana?” Or was he answering a music trivia question? Here is a collection of the thoughts, sayings, views and bathroom graffiti that has been attributed to The Chemical Buddha. Was he a mystic sent to show us the way or just another drugged out freak that incoherently babbled a few crude views about life? Decide for yourself. This blog of his teaching is maintained by his "monks."
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