"Breathing makes me horny."
Quite frankly there weren't many things that didn't make The Chemical Buddha horny. Except orgasms. But orgasms were the only thing that didn't. And really, even that didn't keep him from being horny for very long. He attributed his horndoggedness to his literal love of life. In fact, he said he loved life so much he wanted to cum all over the face of life. (And believe us when we say, he tried to cum on a lot of faces. With varying degrees of success.) Of course, he called it spreading his chi, or life energy. Not that you have to worry about it, but this thinking did completely change this writer’s concept of chai tea. Or, as TCB called it chi tea. (Yes, we know chi, chai are not the same thing, but The Chemical Buddha didn't notice. Or if he did, he didn't care.) It was waaay saltier than I expected.
What do you love about life?
Do you fully invest yourself in your life or do you hold back?
If you invest in life, what do you invest in?
If you're holding back, what are you saving it for?
About The Elvis of Enlightenment
- The Chemical Buddha
- Not much is known about The Chemical Buddha (as he preferred to be called) other than he was a crack baby with fetal alcohol syndrome born into a family of hippie hedonists. Throughout his life, The Chemical Buddha sought spiritual enlightenment through excess. To put it quite simply, he saw himself as the Elvis of Enlightenment. While still in his-mid twenties, The Chemical Buddha left this earthly plain for the last time while beer bonging chicken gravy and shooting heroin as he engaged in an orgy that included at least four members of the amphibian family. His last coherent words, before he asphyxiated on vomit that was not entirely his own, was “Nirvana. Choke! Gag! Cough!” Did The Chemical Buddha transcend his earthly bonds through his unorthodox lifestyle? Did he find the key to “Nirvana?” Or was he answering a music trivia question? Here is a collection of the thoughts, sayings, views and bathroom graffiti that has been attributed to The Chemical Buddha. Was he a mystic sent to show us the way or just another drugged out freak that incoherently babbled a few crude views about life? Decide for yourself. This blog of his teaching is maintained by his "monks."
No comments:
Post a Comment