“None before midnight, none after.”
We’re not sure this insight applies anymore. Because with today’s binge drinking, right before closing time seems like the perfect opportunity to pick someone up and take them home. The Chemical Buddha believed if you hadn’t made contact with someone before midnight, your chances of taking them home were pretty slim. That’s why he tried to get it out of the way early. In fact, he pretty much talked to anything with a pussy and a pulse as soon as they walked in the door just so he'd know what his chances were of getting laid. If it worked, it was because she was too drunk and thought he seemed familiar but couldn’t remember how she knew him.
What old ways of thinking do you hold onto?
How might you be better served by thinking of things in a new way?
How might your hanging on to some old ways help you?
About The Elvis of Enlightenment
- The Chemical Buddha
- Not much is known about The Chemical Buddha (as he preferred to be called) other than he was a crack baby with fetal alcohol syndrome born into a family of hippie hedonists. Throughout his life, The Chemical Buddha sought spiritual enlightenment through excess. To put it quite simply, he saw himself as the Elvis of Enlightenment. While still in his-mid twenties, The Chemical Buddha left this earthly plain for the last time while beer bonging chicken gravy and shooting heroin as he engaged in an orgy that included at least four members of the amphibian family. His last coherent words, before he asphyxiated on vomit that was not entirely his own, was “Nirvana. Choke! Gag! Cough!” Did The Chemical Buddha transcend his earthly bonds through his unorthodox lifestyle? Did he find the key to “Nirvana?” Or was he answering a music trivia question? Here is a collection of the thoughts, sayings, views and bathroom graffiti that has been attributed to The Chemical Buddha. Was he a mystic sent to show us the way or just another drugged out freak that incoherently babbled a few crude views about life? Decide for yourself. This blog of his teaching is maintained by his "monks."
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